I Want to Know You Better » I’m Not Trying to Start a Trend

Seriously, if I interpreted Katty Perry’s new song right, she’s crazy. I mean we don’t live in bubbles. We just spend our time tap, tap, tapping on screens and keyboards, without caring about a single thing. So clearly, she crazy or I’m stupid, and it’s probably the latter. Anyway, I want to know you better. That’s why I’m dedicating this to knowing you better. Your first priority should be to comment your name below. Unless you have to pee, then going to the can is your first priority. Of course, I can’t write a whole post about this, so I’ll just give you this part and the random related segments below.


I Want to Know You Better


I want to know you better

If you’re familiar with my writing style, you’ll know that I use sub-heading for all of my supporting passages. I also use sub-heading for my supporting paragraphs. The first one meant my butt hole if you didn’t know. However, for this post, sub-heading seems a bit or completely unnecessary. Now, back to the point. I want to know a couple of things about you, like “where you live, what kind of car you drive, what’s your home security number, what’s your atm number, and when are you off-guard the most?”. I also want to know if you’re a psychopathic murder who likes cheese, you know, just in case if you want to join my club for psychopathic murders who like cheese? Now bear with me as I ask some psychiatric questions.


First question, what was your first doll? Mine was my stillborn twin, Norman. The doctors had to pry open from my small cold hands. That’s the reason why I was a twisted, cold-blooded child. Second question, at what age did you stop drinking from the bottle? For me, that’s a tough question since I’m still drinking from the bottle. I’m kidding, I stopped at the age of 11. Seriously guys, I’m not kidding this time. Guests look at me like I’m crazy when my mom calls me to feed me using the bottle. Moving on the third question, who was your first boyfriend/girlfriend? Again, this is a tough question for me since I’ve been single for these past 17 years. If you could turn any phrase literal, what phrase would you pick? For me, I would pick “cute enough to eat” since I literally want to devour babies.


Since I presume that you’re telling me all about you, it’s not fair if I don’t tell you a little bit about me. Hi, I’m Salmenn, a future workaholic. (Crowd) Hi Salmenn. For my readers who don’t know, I’m typing this in my WA meeting. Anyway, I’m a presumably a brown-ethnic boy, even though many asked if I’m adopted. I’m currently 17 and I’m going to change my name back to Salmenn. I’m also 17 years old. My father and mother are both older than me by 40 years, so hurray for old people. Finally, to be real, my grandfather just died. That’s all. I don’t want this post to get sad or people to know that I’m bipolar.


I want to know you better. However, I cannot find you nor do I know how you look. Finally, I don’t even know who the heck is “You”. I also want to know you, nee, kamu, anata, that’s all the languages I know. So, if you have the time, please comment below. I assure you, I’m definitely not trying to start a trend or get comments. Also, hashtag #Iwanttoknowyoubetter on twitter, write one thing about you and ask others to do the same. Again, I’m doing this for your sake, not mine. Thank you for reading and I hope you’ll have a wonderful year.

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